Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Swaggy Lineups

The award winning documentary series, 30 - 30, is once again taking a backstage look into the preparation of BRO6. This time we're focusing on the step by step processing of this year's swag:

Step One: Procrastinate for 10 months after BROV, only having brief brainstorming conversations with the Commish about how awesome this would be, before deciding, "yes, lets do this".  

Step Two: Scour ebay for old starting lineup figures, that either resemble your ugly mugs, or are an athlete/sport that is near and dear to you.  

Step Three: Arrive home to the greatest week of mail delivers ever.



Step Four: Live in complete nostalgia for awhile, before agonizing over opening unopened, 20 year old toys.  

Step Five: "The Point of No Return"- Sand/ Scrape/ Modify current figures (removing poofy 80's/European Soccer Hair, leg pads/ facial hair, etc.), before adding them to a hot wash in mild detergent.  If any of you felt a little homoerotic two months ago, it's because your voodoo dolls were in one big hot tub together. (and/or, that's the way you always are...) 



Step Six: Add molding clay to elongate shirts and jerseys/ add hair/ make dip cans/ etc. 

Step Seven: Prime everyone.




Step Eight: Start painting.







Step Nine: Create and apply decals.  


Step Ten: Touch up and clear coat.  So really, a prrrrrrrretty, prrrrrrretty, simple process.  I mean, I looked at my health app on my phone and instead of tracking how many steps I took, it just made the flatlining noise. 

Enough with the process, let's get to what everyone sticks around for on home improvement shows...the before and after reveal!

Anthony:
BEFORE


AFTER
Three-Point Vine in the Hizzy!


Rose:

BEFORE

AFTER




Nate:

BEFORE

AFTER




Chad:
BEFORE


AFTER




Motz:

BEFORE

AFTER





Weaver:

BEFORE



AFTER


Lewis:

BEFORE


AFTER

Mike E.:

 BEFORE

AFTER

Ty

BEFORE


AFTER

Chris

BEFORE

+


AFTER


Hope you all display these someplace appropriate.  I'm thinking they're a notch above your degrees, certifications and prestigious awards.  But for real, thanks for the kind words. Glad you like them.  I think Socrates said it best, "ultimately everyone should have a toy representation of themselves before they buy the farm."



ps- I'll murder you with an empty bottle of Loopy, if I find out you threw yours away in under a year.