BROIV RECAPATATION: PART TRES

The Saga Continues

When last we left our bro-athletes, Team Blue was up 1-0 on the day after a grueling hockey game.  The general public was enthralled by the level of competition, but miffed at the lack of body-armor-enhanced elbows to the head and story lines filled with bad blood. 

EVENT TWO: HOME RUN DERBY

Home Run Derby is a magical event that allows proper time to "rehydrate" after hockey.  We also get to have a good laugh at everyone who only swings a bat once a year. Like the different MLB stadiums, the distance to hit a home run varies from year to year at Brolympics, as we never have a set distance from home plate to the outfield fence.  Some years, such as BROIII, there are many dingers.  Others, such as BROIV, a one handed dude could have kept score. 

Umm...hi...yeah, I'm here to bang your/our/my sister, and to possibly keep score?

You could say things started off slow, as after 4 batters, the score was Army 2 - Blue 1.  Motz batting fifth knocked three more yard, but Rose followed that up with four of his own.  6 - 4 Army with a two run lead.  Ty then answered Rose's four with another four spot. Mike E. one upped the previous two batters, blasting five dingers while screaming "Bring me the finest meats and cheeses in all the land!". 11 - 8 Army with a batter left for each team.  Two big dogs, including the winner of 2012's contest (with 10 Yahtzee's!) Weaver and Mr. Walk-Off himself, Pigott. Ultimately Pigott fell one short of tying the game and putting any pressure on Weaver who put the finishing touches on the Army victory by going yard twice as well.  Final score 13 - 10, Army ties the day up at 1-1.

MVP: Mike E.
Most Home Runs By One Player: Under 10.5
Longest Home Run: Pigott

EVENT THREE: HORSE SHOES

The games were at an all too familiar spot after two events, tied 1-1 going into Horse Shoes.  Despite the addition of homemade backstops, after many minutes of low scoring tosses, and the fear that we may be late for our first class trip to the bowling alley, an audible was called and games were played to 15 instead of 21.  In one of the first round match-ups we had Lentz and Weaver going head-to-head with Pigott and Fugate.

It was close but no cigar for Army as Blue bested them 15-12 in one of the first round matches.  Over on the other side of the field, we had a Chris and Rose vs. Lewis and Motz.

 To say it was a blood bath would be a slap in the face to the 15 -3 domination that Pigott/Deluca laid on Rose/Lentz in 2012.  But it wasn't close.  Eventual event MVP Motz was feeling it and Blue took the second of the first round matches down 17 -10.  No need for the interesting third round match up of the Erno's vs. Fugate/Deluca.  As you can tell, I spent my event time snapping some action shots and continuing to rehydrate...surely not foreshadowing anything for later in the day.

 On a personal level, if I was able to pull a positive from this event, it's that it gave me a new caller ID photo for Deluca.

MVP: Motz
First Ringer: Motz
Ringers in One Game: Under 4.5

UP NEXT:

• It's raining threes...and tequila!
• Why yes I'll have a side of whiskey with those meatballs. (that's what she said)
• Annual bowling mayhem
• Darkness (unrelated to the previous three bullet points) (probably)

BROIV Recapatation Part Duex

Spirits were high as we approached the official beginning of The 2013 Brolympic Games. Team Army's unity was at an all time high. Group texts, clandestine training meet ups and over the top strategy talk dominated the last few months leading up to BROIV. I can only assume Team Blue was preoccupied with catching up on some online Double Dribble fan fiction, or training for something completely unnecessary, like gargling tequila while reciting the 1992 Phillie's roster in reverse alphabetical order.

...and then, after the pyramid formation, the cheerleaders did something called "the human centipede".

Regardless, the months of build up had lead us to this point:

LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!

OPENING CEREMONIES

For the fourth year in a row, Team Army gets an early lead in beverage consumption as Rossello performs his customary opening bong.

Folks...get used to this.

  EVENT ONE: STREET HOCKEY

 Despite an intense rivalry and some tight games, Team Blue has bested Team Army every year in Hockey (as well as the entire Brolympic games...if wikipedia is to be believed).  It didn't appear as if history was going to change as Ty lit the lamp and put Team Blue up 1-0 early in the first period.  They made it 2-0 in the second and Team Army was having a difficult time solving Blue's defensive scheme.  After some intense back and forth action, Team Army found the back of the next and halved the lead, 2-1.

 

The third period brought out an whole new intensity from Team Army as Rossello and Weaver both fired shots past Lewis.  One of the goals being a beautiful one-timer off of Rose's stick (if I'm remembering correctly and not just flashing back to the 8-1 thumping of the Blues I just administered in game 2 of my NHL14 Stanley Cup Final.)

Do you believe in ALMOST miracles?!! With Army nursing an unheard of 3-2 lead deep into the 3rd, Team Blue tied it up with a late shot from someone that I also don't remember. (stellar work me!)  You smell what I smell??? BONUS HOCKEY!  You heard it here last...unlike an ellipsis, three periods wasn't enough. (whaaat... grammar humor?!! Watch that highbrow sh*t merno, I came here for booby references and fart jokes!)

Flashback to BROI which also went to OT.  Like a virgin on prom night, it only lasted 7 seconds as Pigott took the face off and buried it past Lentz.  This years OT lasted a few more pumps as both teams traded chances.  Midway through the extra period Deluca took the ball from behind the net and beat Lentz to the corner post for his second goal of the game and put Team Blue in a familiar position, up 1-0 for the day.

Team Army Goals: Weaver (2), Rossello (1)
Team Blue Goals: Deluca (2), Fugate (1), Motz (1)

Prop Bets:

• First to Score- Ty
• MVP- Anthony
• Combine Goal Count: Over 6.5 goals

Up Next:

• Going yard
• Bad box of Trix: complete with unlucky horse shoes
• Would you like some Dude with your 3pt vine?